With the new year upon us I thought that it’s about time that I head back to the blog. It’s been a little while since I posted and I thought what better way to start 2019 than with a post on self-worth. My fave. Now be warned, this is brutally honest but I think that sometimes honesty is the best policy…

So, putting it bluntly, 2018 ended with a bang (and I’m not talking about the fireworks across London kind of bangs). I found out that a guy that I had been dating- dinner dates, cocktail nights, flowers-at-the-door kind of dating- and speaking to nearly every day for over two months has a girlfriend who he had been with for the majority of the time that we were meeting. Shocker, I know.

You’re probably wondering how I didn’t clock what he was up to. I did, in a way. Firstly, I cut things off with him because I suspected that he was speaking to and possibly meeting up with other women. Something which, if I’m taking you seriously, I clearly wouldn’t be cool with. Secondly, his girlfriend lives in another city- convenient- making it easier for him to hide it from the both of us.

Now, anybody who knows me, knows that I think that cheating is the worst thing that you can do to somebody. I don’t condone it at all and if I were to be cheated on, the guy would be out of my life quicker than he could even think of a cover-story, never mind have the chance to say it to me. I’ve reached an age where I know exactly who I am. I understand what I want in life and what I don’t and I am no longer able to tolerate people who are unworthy of my time. Harsh maybe, but true.

Anyway, although he admitted that he was speaking to other girls he completely failed to mention that he actually had a girlfriend, so how exactly did I find that one out? Long story short, he posted a picture of them together on Instagram. Yes this is the kind of fool that we are talking about. Did he want to get caught?! Of course, I did what I feel (and hope) most other women would do and got in touch with his girlfriend. I wasn’t 100% sure on the situation, but if my man had been actively dating another woman (and godknows who else) for two months, I sure as hell would want to know about it.

So, why am I telling you this? Well, after this little drama that ended the year, it’s really made me think a whole lot more into the importance of being able to love yourself and recognise what you deserve. I know in myself, as I am today, that I would not tolerate that behaviour, yet it began to cross my mind that his girlfriend actually might stay with him… and although I’ve been there before, I think that’s kind of sad. Whatever her decision, it really isn’t any of my business, however I really do hope that she is strong enough to walk away and let him realise her worth the hard way. All women (and men) deserve to be treated like the Queens and Kings that they are.

What I’m really trying to say is, don’t let people mess with your vibe this year and onwards. It’s okay to walk away from people and things that do not serve us anymore, no matter how difficult that step may be. If there’s one thing that you do in 2019, across love, career and your personal life, make sure that you…

Know your worth. 

And on a final note to self: do not trust men who pull up on you in their van… After reading that back, it was doomed from the start!